For personal development, it is important that a child feels loved. Are you afraid of sometimes being too clumsy in the ways of showing him your love? Here are some very simple tips to apply on a daily basis…
Let us be “united together in love” (Colossians 2: 2). Here is a short sentence but very much summarizing the spirit of a family and the love that we can have for each other. If it seems obvious to love your child, it may be less so to make sure that he does not doubt it. However, it is essential that the child feels the love that is shown to him daily, without necessarily going through the word. Several gestures, behaviors, distinct signs may be enough for the child to understand that we love him and that we consider him fully.
You can find a lot of benefits in expressing your love for a person. This contributes to the identity building of an individual and like many things, the most decisive period for this is childhood. Find out what it can be like for a child to feel loved at first and how to show him that he is loved, with actions rather than words.
The primordial love in psychological construction
It is very important indeed, for the psychological construction of the child, that he feels the love that one has for him. This love is essential from conception and during life in utero. Indeed, the love transmitted by the mother and the entourage from a very young age will have a great influence on the future behavior of the child, as well as his development, his confidence and the construction of his identity.
Beyond these personal benefits, this will help in particular to develop an ability to love. The more the child is loved, feels loved, the more he will manage to love others and to demonstrate it, in various ways. The child will thus gain confidence in himself and in others, will, in turn, learn to love life; he will gain in self-esteem, will feel that his opinion counts, will be able to do things and make choices. Thus love, like cement, consolidates all the traits of a personality.
Of course, saying “I love you” to your child is important, yet there are many ways to do it. Here are a few, which can be used every day, to express your love other than by saying it.
1. Cuddle and kiss him
Body language sometimes constitutes more than 60% of the message during communication between two people. No wonder the proofs of love are so extremely dependent on our physical relationships. Kissing and cuddling your kids are great ways to show them your love. When you look at him squirming in his baby carrier, put tenderness in your looks, gentleness in your gestures towards them, will make them understand their importance in your eyes
2. Be there
Social worker and personal development coach, what is most important is the presence of the parents. Be there. Invest in our child, with him, in his life. To be an observer and not only to spend more time with him but to ensure that this time is of better quality. Indeed, do not hesitate to put aside one or the other task in order to devote yourself to him, by playing, demonstrating your interest in him and what he does, by asking his opinion.
3. Listen to him and know how to be available
Comfort your child, share his feelings if they are justified. If the child feels you are available, he will feel loved. Be there for him, attentive, trying to answer any questions he may have, even if you don’t have the answers. There is nothing wrong with saying that you do not know, but do not ignore it. Privilege moments in private when you can, to show him that he can “have” you just for a moment, and thus feel really count for you.
4. Trust Him
Another way to show your child that you love them is to trust them. By giving him free will, you will prove to him that you believe in him. Despite the fears that you may have, often personal, it should not be forgotten that children are different from us and that they may succeed where we have failed. By trusting him, he will feel confident himself and able to allocate his trust to others. It is better to say to a child: “I know you will get there” than “Be careful, you could fail”, even if we are afraid for him. Trust is a huge gift of love.
5. Respect it
Respect is also one of the bases of any relationship, and it must exist in a reciprocal way. One of the most beautiful proofs of love is to know how to respect your child and leave him alone when he needs it. Knowing how to be tolerant, forgiving, respecting your choices and being able to hear your point of view even if you do not agree, here are certain ways to make your child understand that you love him, and this from unconditional love, beyond his personal needs and opinions.
6. Encourage him
When you are encouraging, even in chess, your child will not only gain confidence but feel loved despite the weaknesses he may have. Show yourself proud of him, for the work he does, for the ideas he has, for the motivations he finds. Also, be thankful for what it does for you or for others; gratitude is a wonderful feeling of love. You are the guide of your child, know how to offer him motivation and faith in himself.
7. Be protective
A child who feels safe feels loved. Indeed, if he knows he is safe, he feels the value he has for you by the way you preserve it. Be careful, however, not to “cover” it too much. Overprotection can, on the contrary, bring a feeling of incompetence: the child will think that you believe him incapable of doing such or such thing, he will be persuaded of it and of this fact will lose confidence in him. It’s about finding the right measure so that the child feels safe without feeling restrained, just like in the famous expression: give him roots and wings.
8. Set limits
All of our lives we are constantly learning. The child, from an early age, will learn every day, at every moment. However, all learning requires a framework and benchmarks. It is the role of parents to know how to set limits, to establish rules. The child needs leaders to lean on. It is an effort and a daily work to raise a child, an effort of which he is aware and which he deeply appreciates. If he understands that you are investing in this role of parent, he will appreciate the limits that you will set even if it seems to you that it is the opposite, because these rules once again prove the importance, the time, the patience that you put in this role.
9. Give her the freedom to be
It is also important to give your child the chance to be what he is and not what we want him to be. Do not put the weight of your expectations on him. Loving him also means having the strength to make him independent and to let him no longer need you. Even if it is difficult to see your child move away and gain independence, it is a beautiful proof of love to let him take off, and it does not affect the love you have for each other.
10. Be happy and optimistic!
By showing you happy and positive, your child will understand that his presence in your life is a great condition. Optimism and happiness are both evidence and love factors. By proving your affection for the whole family, including your spouse, your child will also learn to love, and he will see that everyone has their place in the family and will feel happy and loved there.
11. Focus on honesty
Finally, don’t lie to your child. He loves you and trusts you and would feel hurt by a lie. He might think you’re lying to him because you don’t like him. When you make a promise, stick to it. Even if there are things that are sometimes difficult to explain to a child, do not hesitate to stick to the truth, even if it must be simplified or imagined, until the child grows and can understand. Honesty is, once again, proof of incomparable love and trust. Here are some tips on raising a smart baby.
These things will help you express your love to your child without even saying it. However, it does not undermine the importance of being vocal when it comes to expressing your love. Do not miss a chance to tell them loud and clear that you love them – it will surely give you another great gesture to count on.