Empty nest syndrome refers to the feelings of grief, sadness, loneliness, and adjustment that many parents experience when their children leave home. As children grow up and become more independent, leaving for university, work, or to start their own families, the parental role changes dramatically. While this is a normal part of life, it can be an emotionally challenging transition for many parents. Here are some tips on coping with empty nest syndrome.
Understand It’s Normal to Feel Sad
It’s completely normal and expected to feel a sense of loss when children move out and start their independent lives. After years of being hands-on parents, it’s an abrupt change to have an empty, quiet house and a calendar that’s no longer filled with sports matches and school events. Give yourself permission to mourn this passage of time. Share your feelings with your partner or close friends. Know that the sadness and grief will pass.
Stay Busy and Maintain Routines
Having an empty schedule can exacerbate feelings of loneliness. Stay active and busy to give your days purpose. Maintain daily routines like exercising, preparing healthy meals, engaging in hobbies, and meeting up with friends. Try new hobbies or projects to fill your extra time in a meaningful way. Volunteer work is an excellent option that can provide social connection and a sense of fulfilment.
Strengthen Your Relationship with Your Partner
With more time on your hands, focus on strengthening your relationship with your spouse or partner. Schedule regular date nights. Take weekend trips together. Engage in activities you both enjoy. Make time to talk through any issues. Losing the common focus of raising kids can reveal underlying problems in a marriage. Counselling may help facilitate conversations on reconnecting.
Reinvent Yourself
This new phase of life presents opportunities for self-growth. Enrol in adult education classes, learn new skills, join a club, take up a cause – pursue your passions and develop a new sense of purpose. Travelling and reevaluating your bucket list goals are other great ways to challenge yourself. Allow your interests and identity to evolve beyond just being a parent.
Stay Connected with Your Kids
While your children are adults now, they still need emotional support. Remain an active part of their lives by staying in touch regularly via phone calls, texts, social media, and visits when possible. Offer advice when asked but be careful not to overstep boundaries. Respect their independence while letting them know you’re there if they need you.
Welcome New Family Additions
The departure of children often leaves a void eventually filled by marriages, grandchildren, nieces, and nephews. Embrace these new additions to the family. Offer to babysit grandchildren and get involved in their lives. The joy of grandchildren can help compensate for the sadness of an empty nest.
You could even try fostering a child! Find out what to expect by chatting with an agency like fosterplus.co.uk.
Support Other Parents
Use your experience to support friends and family members going through the same transition. Sharing stories and empathising over the complex emotions can normalise the feelings. Consider joining a support group, either locally or online through social media groups.
Know that the empty nest phase doesn’t last forever. Adjusting takes time but most parents do adapt successfully to this new season of life.